if only

i love you, i loved you all along...

2006-08-07T05:50:00.001-07:00

whoa! whoa! ang cute ng lyrics noh? haha. its 'far away' by nickelback....gosh, i love them! that phrase is not related to what im going to write in my blog...haha

this day went good. or shall i say fine...hay...wala namang magandang pangyayari, natatangap ko na were just friends...haha. its ok. atleast, may bago na naman akong friend who i can rely with. he's such a nice guy. at hindi na ako makikipagagawan, kung un man ang ginawa ko dati. and for pete's sake, he has a girlfriend! gosh! madami pa naman jan, naliligaw nga lang sila..

shit! i realy want to watch sukob! argh!!! but wala akong kasama! my not-so-gentleman classmates, ayaw akong samahan! haha.. but their nice. haha. masarap silang kasama, lagi ka nilang papatawanin...hayy...

ok, dito na lang muna, fuck, im so tired...

-_-

auspicious..

2006-08-05T06:00:00.001-07:00

gosh, i can't beleive that i am auspicious! aspicious in different things! haha. good thing may pakikisama ako sa mga kaklase ko. i don't want to have the wrong impression again that i am so "mataray" or whatever they want to call it.

this has been another tiring day, we just had our surprise quiz in algebra! i think i did not pass that stupid test! blame it on the proff! haha

di na naman cia pumasok. i miss him. i miss my friend. my confidante. don't get me wrong. im trying my best here para maging kaibigan lang ang turing ko sakanya. and i think im beginning to taste victory. *cross fingers*. para ngang di pa rin ako makapaniwala na naisulat ko yung blog na yun. *yesterday* gosh, nevertheless, the only point-that i have just realized now that i am not in love with him! thank God for that!

feeling ko ang weird ko because i dont want to fall in love. on the contrary, i do, but not this time, im still focusing on my studies pa kasi! furthermore, i want it to be in the right place at the right time with the right person. and i also believe that you just have to wait...

anyways, thats all for now. im damn tired! physically and emotionally! im drained!

ciao!

^ ^
*

if only....

2006-08-04T05:19:00.000-07:00

i miss u...

if only u were in my shoes, malalaman mo, malalaman mo kung gano kahirap ang mga pinagdadaanan ko. i really wish that this feeling is just an attraction. a normal one. i'm not ready or shall i say na di pa mature to enter into a romantic relationship. i can't handle it. it won't work. u are a close friend, and naiipit talaga ako between friendship and "love". haay, i thought that this is going to be easy, i have been in my total equilibrium until u came...

pls..help me hate u. or, let me hate u. do something that will make me hate you...